Posts Tagged ‘darwin awards’

Ewwwwww … What Kind Of Dick Would have Sex With A Hornets Nest

March 12, 2014

Somebody dug up this old story from Ann Brewslaw in Cosmopolitian and I had to spread it round. (h/t to The Tap for putting it in front of my face)

Attempting To Have Intercourse With Hornet’s Nest Is Very Bad Idea

Irrefutable law of physics: If it exists, some dude has tried to have sex with it. And if it has a hole, at least one guy you know personally has totally had sex with it.

Case in point: In a weird, fatal tryst that belongs in the Darwin Awards, a 35-year-old Swedish man we’ll call “Hasse” was found dead on his farm at around noon on Monday. The dead body of this Hasse, who was known in local “tavern circles” (which sort of explains why he might have thought that sticking his knob into a den of hundreds of hornets was a good idea), was found with 146 wasp stings on his body, 54 of which were located on his genitals and scrotum, according to KPC Radio’s Walton and Johnson blog.

Picture this: You’re a hornet, and you’re just chilling at home. Quiet night in. Suddenly, right in the middle of that episode of M*A*S*H you were watching, a Huge Pinkish Turgid Monster crashes through the wall of your house. No wonder they were mad.

don't fuck with the hornets nest

No matter how long you stare at the pic of a hornets’ nest or how long it is since you had sex, it looks nothing like a lady’s naughty bits.

I’ve read Stieg Larssen’s novel from The Millennium Trilogy, The Girl Who Kicked A Hornets Nest, but I never though I’d read the story of The Guy Who Fucked A Hornets Nest.